I can only work when I’m on the wire with a deadline and I basically flipped out yesterday morning for software not working. I knew it wasn’t going to work. I’ve been drawing mock up and blue prints in between slow moments at work, so I know what I have to do.
I’m going to cobble together a draft, and try to to clean up the bedroom since my boyfriend’s grandmother is coming to visit. One room at at time is our goal, and right now I have to work on organizing all the clothes and getting rid of all the garbage that’s hidden away from the furniture.
I have at least five commission things going on, the process of trying to get into school, and SO MANY DOLLY PACKAGES. I need to send to people. I should just slap some velcro on the doll dresses I made for my pen pal and call it a day. But I’m such a perfectionist, but of course I’m procrastinating on everything by sewing doll clothes for a doll I don’t evne have yet since that’s how I calm down.
I got to get fucking dressed already and work on this menu!
-i worked with both illustator and corel draw in class & while corel draw had better software for getting the correct lines amd curves- illustrator was by far easier to work with (for me) so since gimp is open source youre going to find a difference-
That’s something I’m worried about. Relearning the interface in time to make something half way decent.
Downloaded gimp, (for photoshop) inkscape (for illustrator) and scribus for indesign. I got dressed my bag is mostly packed. I took the trash out. Don’t have time to fold and put away the clean laundry but I knew I wasn’t going to have time to anyways.
Now I got to do dishes so the boyfriend can cook when he comes home. I’m trying not to feel like human filth because I don’t pull my weight around the house. It’s just super frustrating for me since yes the boyfriend and I both work full time and have a hard time managing things and he says that I barley do anything around the house, and sometimes I feel like he barely does anything, when in reality I think we sabatoge each other unwittingly, and blame the other which is not healthy.
Neither of us has a system that works for both of us since our lifestyles tend to clash. He hates how I sew at the kitchen table but it’s the only place where I HAVE A CLEAR TABLE and I can’t use the craft room since when I do get to sew he keeps wanting me to be within shouting distance to interact since I can’t work on the bed since needles will get lost in the bed, and we both end up eating on the bed since the kitchen table is too short for him and he can’t stick his knees under it and that means I keep missing hidden dishes that need to be washed, and he says I’m taking over the entire apartment with my crafting stuff in silent protest and that’s because I feel like I live in a dude’s place and I’ve given up on trying to make the place look nice anymore, since I don’t have the funds or time or energy to get it the way I want and I just want to curl up into a ball and disappear, since every time I try to bring these up he makes claims about how I never do enough to help out (and yes it’s true I should be able to do more) and says I’m hiding behind my mental illness which is a huge slap in the face since I’m working so hard at getting better and he thinks now that I’ve gotten so much better I should just act like an adult but I just have a ton of really bad habits I’ve internalized growing up that I have to break and that takes time.
This is what I get for not taking my medication right when I got out of bed
I aimlessly waundered around for five hours instaed of doing my chores getting printouts for the content I need for design stuff and I didn’t eat get dressed or had coffee and just adsfljkafl;kjfsda;laskdjfls;kj I at least managed to get dressed trying to stop the screaming and spinning in my head.
Once I get dressed and have my bag packed I got to at least do dishes. That will take like 15 minutes tops adn I can head to work.
My boyfriend’s family is coming over to see the apartment and i’ts my job to clean the whole place every day before work so it’s presentable and I’m trying to freak the fuck out and I’m being super childish and dumb about the whole thing and I wish I could just get my shit together.
So I’ve been trying to get the adobe creative suite for my freelance design work and can’t afford the subscription fee. My friend was super kind and offered her pc disc of Adobe CS6 (since she used the mac one) but I can’t get the serial number for it since she’s using it for the mac disc.
The worst part is I had a disc copy of cs5 from my boyfriend’s old work place but I gave it to my sister (who’s planning to go to art school) and knowing her it’s probably lost and scratched up and ruined.
I’m just freaking out since I want to do a good job on these menu designs for my boss, and my boyfriend is like “Just use gimp! Or open source software it’s fine!”
But I’m freaking out since I’m trying to make a vector out of my boss’s logo, and I can’t find any good reliable software that makes vectors, or is centered around good typography.
I mean I downloaded gimp and I should use that but gimp is a photoshop equivalent not an adobe illustrator equivalent, and I use the entire creative suite for graphic design work, and I was freaking out and not going to lie it kind of stung when my boyfriend said I was being childish for insisting on using adobe products only.
And just AAAAAAAAAAAAARGH
I’m googling open source alternatives to the creative suite.